There is peace in the ksar

This is a special New Years edition of the blog, and is another lesson from my travels to Morocco. This is the third in a series of three about peace. I won’t pretend to say that I won’t talk about peace again, because honestly, that is what my coaching is all about.

We had the privilege of going deep into a ksar and visit a family in their home, because Radounne, our guide, had done his research for his Masters degree in this town. He still had a relationship with this family.

A ksar is a Berber fortified village. The architecture is much like that of the pueblo people here in the southwest –  a maze of connected homes made of thick adobe walls, multiple stories, central courtyards, work space on the rooftops and no indoor plumbing, although they do have electricity.

The people were extremely welcoming and proud of their home.

They had a few important things, such as a silver tea service, some family photos and beautiful hand crafted functional items.

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They really had very little.

They were happy. I believe that they were genuinely happy.

That really struck me, and later, we wondered out loud – as we do – how that could be.

Rad said simply, “They have everything they need.”

Hmmm. I took that in and realized that it is another key to personal peace.

We want and aspire. That’s a good thing, because that is how we grow and create and invent and change.

Sometimes we get “want” and “need” confused. We think we “need” something we don’t yet have, and that thought makes us feel discontent and unhappy (or perhaps guilty or deprived or…). And then we struggle.

That is another conflict that isn’t necessary.

We can remind ourselves that we have everything we truly need today. We can settle into that peaceful thought and build a foundation.

Then, from that foundation of peace we can aspire, challenge, create and achieve – instead of struggle.

So as you set your goals for 2019 or create your New Years resolutions, pay attention to the wording, and watch how it makes a difference. Try playing with the idea that you don’t NEED to do anything. But what you want to do, what you aspire to do, that’s a different thing altogether!

If the idea of changing up how you set your goals intrigues you and you want to talk about it, post something in the comments, send me an email or schedule a free goal setting session with me.

Remember: in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love and light,

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This is often a time for setting goals for the new year. If you’re interested in tackling a big goal for yourself, and you want to try a different approach, email me (maggie@talktomaggie.com) or schedule a free mini session with me (here). A mini session is a short coaching session, where we can talk about the noise that’s holding you back and what you can do about it. We can set you up to succeed without struggling!

If a mini session isn’t vibing with you right now, but you still want more, you can check out more blogs on my new website www.maggiehuffman.com

Peace, Neutrality and Quiet

Today’s blog is another lesson from my travels to Morocco. This is the second of three about peace.

When I think of peace, sometimes I think of Switzerland in the winter because that represents the magic combo for me – quiet and neutral. You know how quiet it can be in the snow – that kind of quiet. The desert is also like that.

When I was traveling in Morocco, I was reminded of how important neutrality is for peace. By the way, I’m talking about personal peace here – peace of mind – not politics.

I decided that I was going to have a very open mind. I said that there would be more on this later. Well, later is now. (ooh – time warp!)

Having an open mind means that you don’t go in carrying ALL of your baggage – your pre-conceived notions, opinions and judgment – maybe just your carry on (because you’re human).

Having an open mind means deciding ahead of time that the situation is neutral (it is what it is) and it calls for neutrality on your part.

You get to be curious. You can observe, just look at the facts.

You don’t need to judge. You don’t have to make it mean anything. It doesn’t need to be good or bad, right or wrong, safe or dangerous.

It certainly doesn’t have to mean anything about you. That’s sneaky good. So many times we create a lot of noise in our heads trying to figure out what something means about us, when it really doesn’t have anything to do with us. Say some one comes home in a bad mood, eats sugar, is a vegan, or even snaps at us. It is so freeing to be able to say to ourselves, “wow, this really isn’t about me at all.”

That’s the key to the quiet in the snow, the Jedi mind trick. Nothing to worry about here, nothing to judge. Move along. Sssh.

Now, I’m not saying that nothing is important. Not at all. I am saying that you get to choose what you think is important, when you want to make it mean something, when it can be about you, when you want to judge something and decide if it is awesome or horrible.

And the rest of the time, you can just decide to have an open and peaceful mind.

And remember: in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love and light,

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December is often a time for setting goals for the new year. If you’re interested in tackling a big goal for yourself, and you want to try a different approach, email me (maggie@talktomaggie.com) or schedule a free mini session with me (here). A mini session is a short coaching session, where we can talk about the noise that’s holding you back and what you can do about it. We can set you up to succeed without struggling!

A humbling lesson in peace

Another lesson from my travels to Morocco. This is the first of three about peace.

Day one, I was on a bus with a small group of American tourists who where there to experience Morocco. Our guide, Rad, started by telling us about Morocco as a country, with a brief introduction of the religion, climate, politics, etc., just as you’d expect.

In describing how Morocco fit in with the geopolitical region, he said, “We have conflicts, but we have no enemies.”

It was one of the most profound things I’ve ever heard.

It seems to me that we live in a time that is defined by differences, disagreement and division. We are polarized by our differences. When we have disagreements, we take it for granted that we become enemies.

It doesn’t have to be that way.

Rad was describing the specific political climate in his country. I understood that, but also heard something that could be applied everywhere.

It is possible to have disagreements without being enemies. Conflicts can be resolved if you aren’t enemies. If you aren’t at war, you can just have a discussion. You don’t need peace talks. You just talk.

This is also true for inner conflicts, I think. There is a peaceful way.

And remember: in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love and light,

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If you’re interested in tackling a big goal for yourself, and you want to try a different approach – a peaceful one – email me (maggie@talktomaggie.com) or schedule a free mini session with me (here). A mini session is a short coaching session, where we can talk about the noise that’s holding you back and what you can do about it. What do you have to lose? Literally!

Love really is in the little things

Another lesson from my travels to Morocco.

I have to tell you that my first impression was my first real lesson in Morocco, and it came when I went into the Hassan II Mosque in Casablanca.

It’s huge. It can hold a huge number of souls – inside and outside. It was virtually empty when we went in.

My first impression was that it was covered with details, with embellishments. I didn’t see any cohesive pattern. My senses were overwhelmed because I couldn’t make sense of it. I was trying to look at the whole, with my western eyes. It felt like Rococococococo to me. I didn’t understand.

Then our guide started explaining the architecture. He didn’t start with the building. He did it piece by piece. These are the components of the arches, this is what they mean. These are the components of the columns, and this is what each element means. These are the mosaics on the floor; this is what the wooden mesh screens mean, etc., etc. And he talked about how many people made each thing, what kind of artisans they were, where they came from, how long it took.

He told stories of how much love and care went into each element, how much attention to detail.

We walked outside. There’s a vast courtyard, with a very intricate design made of stone pavers. The kind of thing that would just be all concrete at home, you know?  There was a man repairing a section. He was restoring the original design so that you couldn’t even tell that a repair had been made. I knew it would probably take him all day to finish his section.

Love can be expressed in the attention to detail. Love can be seen in the details.

I learned not to look at the whole, but to look at a smaller universe, to see and appreciate the detail. It can be very different from the universe right next to it. It doesn’t have to match or be cohesive. The beauty is in the detail and the diversity. Diversity.

This month is all about how I took a different approach and how it changed me. If you want to play with that concept for yourself, schedule a mini-session with me, and we’ll talk about it. (It’s free. And fun. And potentially mind-blowing.)

And remember: in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love and light,

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If you’re interested in tackling a big goal for yourself, and you want to try a different approach, email me (maggie@talktomaggie.com) or schedule a free mini session with me (here). A mini session is a short coaching session, where we can talk about the noise that’s holding you back and what you can do about it. What do you have to lose? Literally!

How I had an amazing vacation in Morocco

I went to Morocco in November. It was the best trip I have ever taken in my life. There are many reasons, and I’m going to share a few. In fact, I think I’ll take the whole month of December to share my lessons from Morocco, and a few photos, too, because they are just so beautiful.

This month is all about how I took a different approach and how it played out. If you want to play with that concept for yourself, schedule a mini-session with me, and we’ll talk about it. (It’s free. And fun. And awesome.)

First, why did I have such a great trip? Because I made up my mind that I would. I kept telling myself that this was an amazing experience. You all know the power of making up your mind in advance – and this is just more evidence. Here’s how it played out for me. If some little thing went “wrong” or seemed different than I planned, I just let it be part of the experience. No complaining allowed. Do you have any idea how good it feels to just not allow yourself to complain? I hope you do. I cannot recommend it enough – it is so freeing.

Second, I was surrounded by wonderful people, and I kept reminding myself – and telling them!

Third, the trip itself was amazing. Well planned, highly immersive, jam packed – it was so much more than I expected.

Fourth, I went in with an open mind. Lots more on this later.

Finally (at least for this blog), I was all in. I wasn’t multi-tasking. I didn’t try to fit in work stuff, or coach training stuff, or rehearsing or any of the other things that I normally try to do on vacation. I was fully present. Not only did I get more out of the trip, I also connected more deeply with the people I was with.

With all of that, how could I not have an amazing trip? Hey, here’s a hint…there might be some ideas here that we could repurpose!

And remember: in all things – progress, not perfection!

Love and light,

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If you’re interested in tackling a big goal for yourself, and you want to try a different approach, email me (maggie@talktomaggie.com) or schedule a free mini session with me (here). A mini session is a short coaching session, where we can talk about the noise that’s holding you back and what you can do about it. What do you have to lose? Literally!